Book Excerpt Part I

Recently I read a book by an author I greatly enjoy--a mystery romance novel.  I wasn't looking for anything other than a good read.  And I wasn't disappointed!  But after I had finished the book, a few sections lingered with me and rolled around in my heart and mind for a bit.  Those sections delved into the main character's relationship with God.  As I read, I found myself drawn by those descriptions.  I took those ideas and longings and discussed them with God.  Just as these sections prompted conversations with God for me, I hope you too will find yourself dialoguing with God.

Enjoy the read!

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Ann glanced up from her pad of paper.  She smiled.  “What?  You’ve got that look that says I’m a puzzle to you again.”

“You are, but I like figuring out puzzles.  I’m just thinking.”

“About?”

“You’re quiet, Ann.  The more time I spend with you the more I realize that.” 

“I thought that was pretty obvious.”

“I’m curious.  Are you as quiet inside your mind too?  When you’re with friends you trust, do you have a lot you want to say?  Or is your mind as still and quiet as you often are?”

“What a wonderful question.”  She tilted her head, sat up, and set aside the pad of paper.  “I’m pretty quiet.  Even when I’m not tired, the real me is pretty quiet inside.  With people I’m not shy, not timid, but I am quiet.  I listen.  I hear what’s being said.  If it’s someone I trust, I’ll return confidences in kind.  When someone risks with me, I’ll risk back.  But I rarely initiate, even when it’s comfortable, safe surroundings and a group of friends.  In tennis terms, I prefer to return rather than serve.”

“Why is that?”

“I don’t like being in the spotlight, even when it’s with friends.  I am most comfortable one-on-one, when the topics are going where someone else wants to direct them.”

She hesitated.  “No, let me modify that.  I am comfortable talking with God.  I initiate conversations with Him all the time, on easy topics, hard topics, what’s going on, and with the emotions I want to express in full color.  If you really want to know, the Ann inside speaks freely and often only to God.”

“You’re safe with God.”

“I am.  So that’s where I thrive.  It’s not that I hide with my friends.  There are very few subjects, if any, I haven’t shared with at least one friend.  I trust friends with my secrets.  I talk about what matters to me all the time.  But there are large chunks of who I am, of what I think about and talk about, that reside only between myself and God.  I don’t think that will ever change.”

“How have you learned to trust God like that, Ann?”

She shrugged.  “I’m God’s daughter.  He’s possessive of me.  I like that fact, that certainty, that God chose me and considers me His.  So I give God me.  When I have something to say, when I want to talk, He’s listening.  When I need a friend, He’s there.  When I need something, God’s got it covered.  God and I are good together.  We’ve got a relationship.” 

Full Disclosure, by Dee Henderson, Pages 230-231.