...I love 'em! Not all of them, especially not the ones that come from my mechanic (how would you rate your service? how could we improve? I'd rather skip the unpleasant necessity of mechanics altogether, buuuut I am blessed to own an ancient car.)
The questionnaires I'm thinking of in particular are the fun ones that friends and family send you. I received one this week and have actually gotten back a few responses. I was asked varied questions ranging from favorite salad dressing to asking if I'd been kissed under the mistletoe to states visited. This newest "survey" was a two parter: a check-the-box set of questions and a short answer section. I've filled it out and found out just which of my friends have caught a snowflake on their tongue and which have not.
As I fill out the lighthearted questions I wondered at the sense of fun and enjoyment I felt. What is the attraction here? I'm not sure its the depth of the questions or that we'll discover the meaning of life... So what is the draw? I think I've got a few ideas, but I'm open to being wrong :)
I wonder if the main appeal has to do with building relationships establishing intimacy with those we care about. In the world we live in now we're surrounded by multiple ways to avoid real conversation and distractions that prevent us from connecting with another. Even with my dearest of friends I find this sad phenomenon. Breaking it down from the very beginning, I was excited to receive an email from a special friend; I was chosen and singled out to receive personal information from someone I care about and invited to reciprocate. How often are we the recipient of someone's life details and invited to share our own in return?
I think it opens up within me the desire to be known. Granted, this "questionnaire" method isn't the best way to do so, but it opens the door for further thought. Why is it important that someone know about me? It may not be important for a good majority of people, and I'm fine with that. But I sure do want to be known by the ones I love and care about the most. Why is that? Why do I want to share with others and to hear about the lives of my friends?
Relationship. I think it has to do with the way God designed us. We are created to communicate, love, and interact personally with our God. God created Eve for Adam so he would someone to share with. Jesus came to earth and died for us so we could be restored in our relationship with God. The story has "relationship" written on it from start to finish.
And when relationships are a little rocky? Well, here's an excerpt from a book called "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge:
"Another common enemy that often is at work in women's relationships is a spirit of accusation. In our friendships, in our relationships with peers at work, and especially in our marriages, we often feel we are a disappointment to others, that they disapprove of us. We feel in their presence that we are not enough, or that we are too much. After we leave a time with them, we're plagued by a deep sense of failing. We feel frustrated and irritated and ashamed that we feel that way. Our hearts often land in shame and isolation, or we go to resentment...and isolation.
"Do you know what I am talking about? Do you recognize this in your own life? That replaying of conversations you've had with people, that sense of having blown it, or that other sense of just being really irritated at them? Have you noticed how the feelings grow as you continue to mull it over? Now, who do you suppose would have a vested in ruining your relationships? This is exactly what Paul warned the Corinthians about when he said, "For we are not unaware of his schemes" (2 Cor. 2:11)."
Some of these questions I'm not sure apply in my relationships, definitely not all of my relationships. But what catches my eye the most is the comment "who do you suppose would have a vested in ruining your relationships?" That makes sense to me. I am drawn to relationships, I get busy and the relationships stop growing, or worse yet, somehow emotions get damaged because of a comment or action and the relationship suffers as a result. Even though I love my friends and family it seems so much easier to let them slide. But I love the invitation to share myself with someone? It doesn't quite seem to line up. For that reason I can see that there is that spiritual warfare side of things below the surface of our relationships.
I don't know about you, but knowing this makes me want to protect my God-given relationships, fight for them, continue to share and listen. Even though the questionnaires are fun, I'm challenged to make sure my relationships reach beyond and keep growing.
